Wandering… an excerpt from Ch. 11 of NEVER SETTLED: a memoir of a boy on the road to manhood

It’s difficult to describe how our moving took us cross country many times, especially in the early days. When I say we lived in twenty places in Colorado, we didn’t always move from one place in Colorado to another. We often moved to Indiana, then Wisconsin, down to Kansas, up to Nebraska, over to Nevada, then back to a new place in Colorado. The best I can describe it is… we were wandering. The phrase, “Not all who wander are lost,” comes to mind. We just never settled down in one place. I don’t know that my dad had a heart for adventure as much as he left all of his problems behind every time, hoping to start anew and find a better life somewhere else. In all reality, he was lost. Very lost. 

Back in April 1975, when I was only 21 months old, Dad had started his good job at the steel mills in northern Indiana. The job was good and the living was good. My parents bought their first house in Hobart Township. This was near where they grew up. They had just three kids at this time. Terri, my older sister of six years and Jimmy, my older brother of four years.

When the steel mill laid my dad off one too many times, our real wandering began. Dad saw the dangers in his line of work and watched a man literally fall into a vat of hot molten steel and disintegrate before his very eyes. The work was treacherous and challenging, but the money was good, until it wasn’t. We lived there for two and a half years and then began wandering…

(later in the chapter)

I can only imagine how our school documents followed us or didn’t follow us during our school transitions. I wonder if my parents even told them where we were previously. I’m sure if they did, they only told them about the previous stop. They must have kept our important documents like birth certificates and shot records readily available since they needed to constantly keep enrolling us in a new school. If they didn’t have them, I’m sure it would have been a red flag for a school district to sick Children’s Services on us. Amazingly, we only ended up in a foster home the one time in Loogootee (other than Terri & Jimmy running away in high school and finishing their high school careers in foster homes).

Underdog. Overcomer. Survivor.

These words have come up from others in reviews of NEVER SETTLED. I love to hear these words associated with my book. Who wouldn’t?!! 

Underdog.

When I hear the word “underdog,” I think of some of the greatest games of all time. The original Patriot team that won the big game with the backup QB, Tom Brady. That’s when my dad started liking them, when they were the underdog. He always rooted for the underdog. 

Which reminds me of the NCAA basketball tournament. The 16 seed versus the number 1 seed. I believe the 16 seed has only won once in the history of the tournament. That’s quite an underdog. My dad always rooted for the lesser seed. The excitement of the tournament where anyone can win one game is perpetuated by the idea of the underdog beating the favored team.

There was a little guy long before all of these athletic contests that showed up in the context of battle. David, literally the little guy, defeated the giant, Goliath—in a most unlikely way, with faith.

Overcomer.

When I hear the word “overcomer,” I think of someone who has faced great challenges. If you want to watch some athletes overcome great challenges, turn on ESPN and watch their 30 for 30 episodes. There are so many stories of what these athletes have overcome. We usually just see the highlights at the end, but don’t know their whole story.

Which reminds me of James Conner, the RB for the Pittsburgh Steelers. He came from the local school, the University of Pittsburgh. But way more than that, he battled cancer as a young adult. Not only did he battle cancer as a college football player, but he overcame! He defeated it!

There are so many characters throughout the scriptures that speak to overcoming—that were overcomers. The main factor that helped them overcome was faith.

Survivor.

When I hear the word “survivor,” I think of someone who has faced death or elimination in some way, but survived. They continued on. Of course, my mind immediately goes to the CBS series that spent 20 years on television. When I watched the first few seasons, I had hoped to participate myself, thinking, I’ve spent a life surviving, I could do that.

Which reminds me of John Rambo. He was captured, not once but twice in Vietnam. In the second installment of his movies, he went back to Vietnam to free the POWs. In the midst of that, he was captured. But he survived and brought others back with him. Not only did he survive, but HE BROUGHT OTHERS BACK WITH HIM! Anyone ever heard of Daniel in the Lion’s Den?!! If not, check it out in the old testament—you know, the Bible. He was thrown into the Lion’s Den to face a ferocious enemy, yet survived due to his faith.

Have you noticed a trend yet? 

Underdogs can win with faith. 

Overcomers can overcome with faith. 

Survivors can survive with faith.

In these tumultuous times, we all need faith—the question becomes, where and how do we place our faith?

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