These TWO things I HATE

I hate asking for help and I hate selling things. Both of these make me feel really uncomfortable inside, as if I’m putting other people out. Sometimes, I can get over those two things if I know what I am asking for or what I am “selling” is good for them. But I still hate it. I see people’s reactions when others try to sell things and I don’t want to make them feel the same way. 

My struggle with asking for help is probably related to being a man. I want to be self-sufficient, to not depend on anyone else. I want to be the one that others depend on. Come to me, I will help you the best I can. I am a helper, myself, and that makes it weird and hard for me to ask for help.

It is doubly hard when the person I am trying to sell or ask for help is a stranger, rather than a  close friend.

There are these two stories in my book. 

When I was in the sixth grade, my dad wanted me to go to our new neighbors, introduce myself and welcome them to our apartment complex. I was terrified. I’m a bit of an introvert and more so with strangers. Not to mention, I was eleven years old and being “forced” to speak to a strange adult. What will they think? What will I say? What am I supposed to say? How do I do this? These thoughts ran through my mind. I had no confidence and felt so stupid.

I still feel this way today in these types of circumstances and I am far removed from being eleven.

My dad, on the other hand, was great at asking for help. He was even better at selling stuff. He was never a salesman, per se. But he had a way with words. He had a way of talking people into doing things, even strangers, particularly strangers. I used to tell people the story where he walked into a small town gas station where we just moved to, talked to the cashier for twenty minutes and walked out with a free hat. He just had a way.

In many ways, I admired him for that ability. 

Not me, though. I’m not that guy. It’s hard for me to do. 

It takes a lot of emotional gumption and energy.

Yet, here I am. I am asking for your help and selling something in the process.

My memoir, Never Settled releases on Sunday, December 27th. 

My parent’s anniversary. Their first anniversary after my dad’s passing.

When an author self-publishes, particularly their first project, they don’t have a budget for advertising, traveling to book promotions and the like. What is going to sell this book, will be word of mouth. Today, word of mouth includes social media and texting. It also includes writing book reviews on Goodreads, Amazon or wherever else the opportunity arises.

Photo by lalesh aldarwish on

I would appreciate it, if you like what you read, if you find it meaningful and hopeful, please, please, share it with others. Feel free to share your paper copy, if you buy one. But definitely share with others on social media, text messages and through book reviews what you thought of the book. 

Will you consider sharing my posts on social media with others when you see them?

Will you consider sharing my links through text messages for those not on social media?

Will you consider talking about my book with other book lovers?

Will you consider writing a review?

Will you consider buying someone a copy of the book?

My concern is not so much, sales. I do hope it helps propel us into our next step in life (more on that later). But for this book, for this project, I hope to get the message out there. 

I hope to get hope out there. I want people to know that you can overcome your difficult life situations and there is hope!

Will you help me share this message?

Published by Shawn D. Congleton

traveler, writer, lover of God, thinker, family dude, in no particular order

8 thoughts on “These TWO things I HATE

  1. Shawn, I am anxious to read your book and share with others. I remember you as a friend of my daughters in Byers. It’s so wonderful to see how your life has evolved! Good luck to you and your family.

  2. Shawn, I recall that when we were friends what a great guy you were. We speak often of you as do our girls. You took me to prom my Freshman year (and had a great time!) and was gracious and insightful enough to let me go home with my now husband of 27 1/2 years. I can’t wait to read your book!

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